Have A Drink And A Smirk: 8.25.16

Football is supposed to be fun but sometimes it isn’t because the people who run it are people and people sometimes suuuuuuuck.

But don’t take my word for it.

Mean Joe:

Mean Joe Greene

Mean Joe: “Right You Are, Adam”

Thanks, Joe.

Now back to the show. Where were we? Ah yes, the annual march of  kids to school and their dorms and mailers telling you that they’ll fail in life if you don’t buy them the insane clothes at Old Navy.

The scary thing? They are right. They will fail. Buy them Old Navy. Or whatever else they want.

Fun Fact

I was not one of the crazy people that got caught up in Daily Fantasy. Were you? Will I lord this fact over you if I met you in person? No. Will I secretly think less of you as I walk away from our otherwise pleasant conversation? Yes.

Obligatory Nostalgia

Name That Decade

Name That Decade

I like the 90s. It was good times being a kid. I do not want to relive every moment of it with you always and forever TV. That said, I will not understand the future nostalgia wave for the 2000s. We want to relive shiny denim suits?

IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT TO RELIVE?

IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT TO RELIVE?

Mean Joe?

Mean Joe Greene

“No I do not”

Thanks Joe.

At least someone agrees with me.

Five and One-Half Things I’m Looking Forward To This Season

  1. The Hope that will fill my soul that first Saturday up yonder in Denton.

  2. Greater than 47% completion of passes attempted I have almost forgotten the look of a good offense. It is but a memory. A ghost of a whisper. The Good Lord above grant me strength, that I may endure more than four Plays of Offence. Can you imagine!

  3. Jeff Wilson

  4. UNT at UTSA It was Mighty Beautiful sight to see my alma mater play in my hometown’s stadium. The loss was Bitter. Revenge will be Sweet.

  5. Air Raid-in’

5.5. CUSA.tv Meh.

Furthermore

We’ve gotten all preview-y, and sports-y, and wrote lots of words but lets all remember that this is supposed to be fun for all involved and so you shouldn’t log on twitter dot com and hack anyone nor should you tweet at a 20-year old kid for not running fast enough for you. You are 45-years old and you were not nearly as good as you remember.

Make good jokes. Funny jokes. Don’t slur anyone or be raycess racist or make me so embarrassed to be associated with you that I curse out loud in front of my grandmother. She’s warned me about that and lord knows I have to listen this time.

Tell Me About Soccer

I went and got all tied down to Important Things and I cannot follow UNT Soccer that closely. Someone should really watch and report back on how much fun it is. I have done a little here and there. Like, read this. Watch this. Listen to this.

Let’s imagine a hypothetical chat:

You: So like why would I send you 500 words about UNT soccer when I could post it on untsoccer dot tumblr dot com or screenshot my Notes app where I wrote up a nice blog about it and stuff.
Me: Well, slightly more people would read it here. That’s really it.
You: Okay. I don’t know.
Me: K.

So yeah. The Internet long ago lowered the barrier to publishing words and so you do not have to wait for SBNation’s Cleverly Named And Professionally Designed Logo-Having Catch All site for Women’s Soccer at Non-P5 Schools blog. You can do your own thing. Like if you wanted.

The only incentive to publishing your words on someone else’s site is that they’ve done all the work for you in hosting, maintaining, and publicizing (in some cases) it. Or you do not want to write a blog — a series of posts — but just like one thing.